POEM: DEADPAN by Solape Adetutu Adeyemi

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My face is always deadpan

You cannot know the half of what I go through

The emotions ravaging my heart

The thoughts fighting in my head

Fighting for expression

Longing for release

My face must be deadpan

I cannot express the hurt inside

I’ll be labelled weak ,you see

I am a full blooded African woman

I cannot, must not be anything but strong

I’ll be cautioned ‘ To control myself!’

I must keep up with this dead pan mask

For your good and mine

I observe all societal niceties

I smile when appropriate

And frown when needed

I cannot allow people to hear

The very loud noises in my head

I must be deadpan

I must be strong

The pressure threatening to submerge me

Must be submerged by me

No one must see it

No one must know it

It appears my life is great

It appears I have it all

But,I know I’m loosing my marbles

I am going crazy

But I must keep pretending

I must keep being dead pan


Solape Adetutu Adeyemi is a creative writer, blogger( lifewithtutu.blogspot.com) and poet. She has published articles in Lagosmetro TV, Write now literary journal, Rejected magazine and a poem titled, Love My Essence in an anthology: Lullaby of Silence.
She has a Bachelor's degree in Microbiology and a Masters in Environmental management from the University of Lagos and has worked for over 12 years in FMCG in varying capacities.

Comments

  1. Damilola4 December 2020 at 12:11

    Beautiful!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Unknown4 December 2020 at 16:58

    Nicely put and a perfect depiction of our struggles and the need to keep fighting. Weldone dear

    ReplyDelete
  3. Peter Aniedi14 December 2020 at 06:04

    True picture of the African woman struggle. Weldone Tutu

    ReplyDelete

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